Your palms start sweating when you think about them leaving home, but they sweat even more when you realise they still haven’t chosen a college, picked a major, or figured out what they want to do with the rest of their lives. You’ve spent 18 years investing in their future, and now, with official college decisions in the rear-view mirror, you find yourself worrying all over again: What if they make the wrong choice? What if they drop out, change majors or waste years (and tuition dollars) in the process? It’s enough to keep any parent up at night, especially those trying to raise Christ-centred kids in a chaotic world.
But here’s the truth: you don’t have to navigate this season in fear. With more than 20 years of experience walking alongside students and families at leading Christian universities, I’ve seen the worries, and I’ve also seen the breakthroughs. This is a season of opportunity, growth, and transformation, for both you and your child.
Here are four essential tips to help you support your child with grace and confidence as they step into college life:
Approximately 80% of college students change their majors in their undergrad tenure. I often wonder if the reason for this has anything to do with the pressures parents put on their kids to decide on a major and career path at 18 years old. The reality is that a standard question like, “Have you decided what you’d like to major in yet?” is inferentially asking, “What do you want to do as a nine-to-five career for the next 40+ years?” Instead of just focusing on job titles, salaries, and schools, I challenge parents to encourage a perspective beyond the next four years, asking questions like:
Answers like, “I want to be a good dad,” “I want to be involved in church,” and “I want to be a wife and mom,” are wonderful explorations that open the door on the back end to discover the career that complements, supports, or bridges that gap. To quote John Piper: “God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them.” As our children explore the things God is laying on their hearts, we must learn to trust that connection, even when we aren’t as in the know as we’d like to be.
Praying with our kids, reading God’s Word together, and having conversations at the dinner table all open the door for candid discussions about their dreams, hopes, fears, and faith. These little habits have a huge impact because they break down communication barriers that many families seem to experience.
Through this family fellowship, I urge parents to encourage open dialogue with questions like: “What are you excited about?” and “What does trusting God look like for you right now?” Listen to what they have to say, and offer wisdom rooted in Scripture. If they’re uncertain about their life calling, remain patient and understanding; after all, they’re only 18 years old. Keep pointing them to God's Word, not the world.
In light of the big-picture perspective, it’s important to consider long-term payoff. Many students hesitate to commit to certain study initiatives like pharmacy programs or physician’s assistant programs due to duration and subsequent cost. I often see parents with the same concerns. Likewise, and on the other hand, students often ignore or delay callings in less lucrative fields like ministry.
This is why I encourage parents to consider the return on investment. When our children feel pulled to a certain career or calling, we must trust God, even when we don’t understand. Within fields like pharmacy and physician’s assistants, the big-picture financial and societal returns are no-brainers. By the same token, a career in ministry (a calling that doesn’t make sense to the world) is one of the best vocations our children could choose; the reward is immeasurable.
‘Letting go’ of our children is arguably one of the greatest difficulties of life. As our kids prepare for college, they are like plants that have outgrown the greenhouse. While the guarded space of their childhood home once provided comfort, safety, and necessary structure, it is now a less conducive atmosphere for their growth and thriving. Therefore, our new role is to shift from their daily protector to that of a lifelong encourager.
This change is not only necessary, but holy, when we learn to trust God’s hand over their journey. As our children develop their moral compass and learn to make decisions independently, our influence should evolve. Consequently, in the day-to-day, we must learn to relinquish control and depend on Christ’s direction over their lives.
Tip: Turning to God’s Word and the avenue of prayer are the keys to this surrender.
Transitioning your teen to college isn’t just about academic success; it’s about their discipleship, independence, and growth. Through earnest prayer, consistent communication, and a Kingdom perspective, we can walk through this life change as more than conquerors, without fear, giving God room to develop our children into the impactful people they’re meant to become.
Thank you to Dr. Lutz for sharing from his decades of experience walking alongside students and families. As you prepare to launch your own young adult, it’s also a meaningful moment to consider how Medi‑Share supports your family during this transition and helps your student step confidently into adulthood.
As your teen steps into this new season, remember that you’re not walking it alone. Medi‑Share exists to support families through life’s transitions, including the moment your child becomes an adult member. From understanding how their membership works at 18, to accessing care while they’re away from home through telehealth, to finding prayer support through PrayerStream, they remain part of a Christ‑centered community that cares for their health and their spiritual well‑being. Just as you’re learning to entrust their future to God, Medi‑Share is here to help them steward their health, finances, and faith as they grow.
Looking for spiritual support? You’re not meant to walk alone. Stay connected with the Medi-Share blog for uplifting articles, useful tips, inspirational stories and helpful resources to support you on your journey with God.